Revisiting Gratitude

 'Thanks' in Finnish

I am so overwhelmed my the outpouring of condolences, sympathy, and empathy I have received since saying goodbye to Murphy. I feel very fortunate and grateful to have so many friends in both real life and the virtual community who have offered gentle and kind words. It is times like this that we feel gratitude of great magnitude and yet I am left wondering, have I been living a mindful and thankful life. I would like to thank yes, but know I have had some obstacles lately of both the external and internal variety.

When I get bottled up in this way I like to go back and read a post I wrote in June of 2009 titled "An Invitation to Explore a Thankful Life". I am not an expert, I can't say that it is the only way to live. However I do know as gratitude's presence wanes in my life the chaos and frustration rise. Time to regroup, to be still, and just be thankful.

Here is my post from last year:

The other day I was taking my laundry down to the laundry room, and the door was locked. While it should have been open the person in charge of opening the laundry room in my building was running late. I admittedly was frustrated for a moment after hauling the basket with two loads down the stairs and having to go back up and wait. Then I realized I wasn't being thankful. I am fortunate enough to have two full loads of clothing and plenty left in my closet. I am lucky to have washing machines available, electricity and clean water. That's when it hit me...my most treacherous unhappy times in my life have resulted from periods where I wasn't thankful.

I have been thinking a lot about what it means to live a thankful life in the last few weeks and I have realized for me it includes three important elements: Awareness, Economy, and Gratitude.

Awareness
When I talk about awareness I certainly include the idea of looking outside yourself and being in tune with your fellow humans and the earth but it's more than that. There is a saying that goes "You can't always get what you want, but you get what you need". Whether this sounds familiar because of a Rolling Stones song or something you've heard in a spiritual setting it still holds true.

Sometimes we can get caught up in goals or an idea of a very specific outcome or desire. We lose sight that we may have already been given the gifts and tools we need. In the past year I have changed jobs unexpectedly, moved two times, and had my gallbladder removed. While I won't go into the personal details I can say that I have learned and grown from each of these experiences. At times it all seemed like too much and I thought I had made mistakes. When I stepped away and looked at what I was learning and appreciated the lesson I reached a point of calm, of peace.

Economy
No, this isn't about stimulus plans or mortgage rates. It's probably one of the most important things I have learned and it has certainly cost me a lot to learn this lesson. The times in my life that have ended in heartache have come from excess; Spending too much money, drinking too much, talking too much, and going too far physically. Realizing that excess was a trigger for self-pity, depression, and overall unhappiness helped me curtail that behavior. Now I spend less money and enjoy simple pleasures, I listen more and learn more, and I listen to my body. Practicing economy has been a break through in my life. It may not be for everyone but it has been the gateway to happiness for me.

Gratitude
Sure, living a thankful life is naturally going to include practicing gratitude. It's easy to be thankful for what we have, the tangible things, be it family, friends, material things. We touch our possessions, we talk with our loved ones, there is no denying them. However for me the gratitude piece is about being thankful for the intangible and the forgotten.

When riding up a hill (literally on my bike) I sometimes curse my decision to go car free. I may be out of breath and my legs are on fire and the rain drops are starting. Then I remind myself, I have been given an amazing gift, my body. I have the luxury of being able to ride 10+ miles without a second thought. I have a home to shelter me from the rain storm. I live in a country where a woman can travel alone and be relatively safe. Some may consider it a "glass half-full" attitude, and I embrace it. I could focus on the negative but rather I give thanks for what I have.

Invitation
I know many of my readers are like minded and are thankful for nature and the simple things in life. However I invite you to explore the elements of Awareness, Economy, and Gratitude during the next week. When faced with adversity see if these tools can help you find happiness or at least a peaceful heart to work through your obstacles.

No Expectations

As I delved further into my yoga practice I recognized the need to let go of my expectations. Once upon a time I  dwelled upon what wasn't going right in my life rather than what is. I spent a lot of  time trying to figure out where I went wrong, what I did wrong, what I didn't do, and why things seemed so hard.

Then about a year and a half ago I realized I haven't done anything wrong. This is my path. As I open myself up to receive the lessons designed for me it seems life is not so hard. I just have to listen and be aware. I let go of my expectations, let go of the destination and have begun to enjoy the journey.  Through this process I have gained faith, empathy, and love. Being open to a path I hadn't thought of, planned on or expected as brought me an amazing bliss.

In the last week my father became very ill, the type of condition that if not caught could have been fatal. I have to say this is the scariest thing that I have been through as an adult. I was forced once again to realize that things can change in a heartbeat. The life you know is not guaranteed to last.  As trite as it may be I will take this opportunity to ask that you all enjoy your journey, love each day. You never know when your path will change and the best way to be ready is by not expecting the destination but cherishing the journey.

Boo Black Friday! Hello Mindful Gift Giving!

I will be honest, I don’t like shopping. I have never understood Black Friday and find it frightening that so many people consider it the highlight of their year. While I am not a fan of that level of consumerism, I love giving gifts. There is nothing like the feeling of giving someone a mindful gift. Something meant for them that says “You’re special and I appreciate you for all that you are”. This season I thought I would put together a few thoughts on ways to be mindful in your giving. My ideas will tend to focus on the outdoorsy and crafty types because that’s what I know, but these ideas can easily transition to people with other hobbies and interests.

Recycle
The term re-gift has a very negative connotation, considered something we do when we run out of time to buy a gift or don’t care enough to shop for someone. However giving someone something you love can be one of the most thoughtful gifts. This year I have asked my friends to not give me gifts however I have invited them to do a holiday book exchange. The rules are simple, it can’t be a new book, it has to be one from their existing stash and that they want to share with me. In return I will choose a book from my collection for them.

Make it with your own two hands (or pay someone else to)
Handmade gifts are mindful because they take time, effort, and love. You can knit for someone or take part in another craft. If they’re a baker or chef you can pull together a collection of your favorite family recipes. For the outdoorsy type you can make a batch of homemade trail mix paired with travel size reusable snack containers.

If you would rather support someone else’s handmade business check out Etsy.com. There are so many amazing artists with so many various items from clothing to art for the wall to unique crafts like altered books there is something for everyone. You can search by color, key words, or category.

Perhaps these are a little too touchy feely for you. You want something simple, neat, and thoughtful. How about a poster of a favorite memory from the past year. I recently mentioned PosterBrain and can’t rave enough about their service. Take a favorite photo and they will quickly send you a poster at a very reasonable price. You‘ll have enough left over for a fancy frame.

A Gift of Support
My dad has no clue what Access Fund it or what they do. However as a climber I would be delighted if he gave me one of their Holiday Gift Packs for the holidays. While many organizations don’t offer such neat little packages they do have gift memberships. Check out the members of the Outdoor Alliance and you’ll most likely find an organization that is important to your outdoors lover.

Of course there are many non-profit organizations that may not have “memberships” per se but a donation in your loved one’s name would be perfect. One of my favorite organizations is Heifer International. With a variety of gifts at varying price levels, a donation on behalf of your family or friend would contribute to a developing community in a very special way.

A Gift of Learning
I have had an incredible year in my study of yoga, trying out Aerial Dance, and my amazing trip with Chicks Rock to Devil’s Lake (thanks again to Pemba Serves). By all rights I am not old, but I am old enough to think ‘I’m too old to try that’. However I have learned that’s just rarely, if ever, true. One of the reasons I am always able to try new things is because my family has never said “Are you kidding?” or “Really, aren’t you too old?”. If your special person, or child, or parent, or friend has been hinting at trying something new give them a gift certificate for a new class. Not only does this give them a jumpstart to make that leap but it says “I believe in you”.

But Cupcake…I just have to buy them something!!!
Mindful giving doesn’t always come in the form of a handmade gift or something philanthropic. Sometimes we can just go to the store and buy something and we’re still giving back and being mindful. For example two of my favorite brands are PrAna and Mountain Hardwear. While I love their products because they’re well made and last a very long time these are also organizations that give back to causes I believe in. Take a few minutes to compare brands when you’re shopping for gifts. While one item may cost a little more they may be supporting causes that you and/or the gift recipient believe in. Choosing mindful consumers shows you care and want them to keep on giving back. For more outdoorsy brands that give back check out my previous post here.

Thanksgiving is right around the corner so I want to take a moment to say thank you for reading my blog. Whether you’re a regular reader or this is your first visit I appreciate that you’re taking the time to check out my thoughts. Living a thankful and mindful life is a constant goal for me and I am grateful that you are exploring these ideas with me.

Wednesday Playlist: Gratitude

Yesterday I was intent on making a playlist to celebrate Veterans Day, but then I realized I didn't really know many songs to use for that theme. So what was I really trying to say? I pondered that on my ride into work where I was presented with a flat tire. I have had a lot of a little bumps in the road lately. I notice they become more frequent when I am not practicing gratitude and thanks.

That is exactly what I wanted to express for Veterans Day is thanks. Regardless of what I feel about current wars or situations I will always be thankful that they're people willing to put their lives on the line. So I thank those who are willing and will work harder to incorporate being thankful daily for all that I have and for all the burdens I am free of. Some of the songs are a little silly but in my mind being thankful means celebrating and letting go. Be silly.

An Invitation to Explore a Thankful Life

The other day I was taking my laundry down to the laundry room, and the door was locked. While it should have been open the person in charge of opening the laundry room in my building was running late. I admittedly was frustrated for a moment after hauling the basket with two loads down the stairs and having to go back up and wait. Then I realized I wasn't being thankful. I am fortunate enough to have two full loads of clothing and plenty left in my closet. I am lucky to have washing machines available, electricity and clean water. That's when it hit me...my most trecherous unhappy times in my life have resulted from periods where I wasn't thankful.

I have been thinking a lot about what it means to live a thankful life in the last few weeks and I have realized for me it includes three important elements: Awareness, Economy, and Gratitude.

Awareness
When I talk about awareness I certainly include the idea of looking outside yourself and being in tune with your fellow humans and the earth but it's more than that. There is a saying that goes "You can't always get what you want, but you get what you need". Whether this sounds familiar because of a Rolling Stones song or something you've heard in a spiritual setting it still holds true.

Sometimes we can get caught up in goals or an idea of a very specific outcome or desire. We lose sight that we may have already been given the gifts and tools we need. In the past year I have changed jobs unexpectedly, moved two times, and had my gallbladder removed. While I won't go into the personal details I can say that I have learned and grown from each of these experiences. At times it all seemed like too much and I thought I had made mistakes. When I stepped away and looked at what I was learning and appreaciated the lesson I reached a point of calm, of peace.

Economy
No, this isn't about stimulus plans or mortgage rates. It's probably one of the most important things I have learned and it has certainly cost me a lot to learn this lesson. The times in my life that have ended in heartache have come from excess; Spending too much money, drinking too much, talking too much, and going too far physically. Realizing that excess was a trigger for self-pity, depression, and overall unhappiness helped me curtail that behavior. Now I spend less money and enjoy simple pleasures, I listen more and learn more, and I listen to my body. Practicing economy has been a break through in my life. It may not be for everyone but it has been the gateway to happiness for me.

Gratitude
Sure, living a thankful life is nautrally going to include practicing gratitude. It's easy to be thankful for what we have, the tangible things, be it family, friends, material things. We touch our possessions, we talk with our loved ones, there is no denying them. However for me the gratitude piece is about being thankful for the untangible and the forgotten.

When riding up a hill (literally on my bike) I sometimes curse my decision to go car free. I may be out of breath and my legs are on fire and the rain drops are starting. Then I remind myself, I have been given an amazing gift, my body. I have the luxury of being able to ride 10+ miles without a second thought. I have a home to shelter me from the rain storm. I live in a country where a woman can travel alone and be relatively safe. Some may consider it a "glass half-full" attitude, and I embrace it. I could focus on the negative but rather I give thanks for what I have.

Invitation
I know many of my readers are like minded and are thankful for nature and the simple things in life. However I invite you to explore the elements of Awareness, Economy, and Gratitude during the next week. When faced with adveristy see if these tools can help you find happiness or at least a peaceful heart to work through your obstacles.